Why I Can't Be an Arizona Cardinals Fan (For Heidi)

A friend of mine suggested I become a fan of the Arizona Cardinals. Sorry Heidi, I just can’t do it. More than just saying “no” though, I want to annotate my “No!”

Number 1: No disrespect, but they drafted a guy with the first name of Beanie as their first pick for the 2009 draft. How can a star running back ever be taken serious with a name like Beanie? Coach should go ahead and just paint a bulls-eye on the front of his jersey. “Nice run Beanie?” Can’t do it.

Number 2: Both of their star receivers take more pride in their hair extensions than in their work ethic. Which reminds me of the time my Brother Danny was going to get cornrows in New York last summer. Click here for that pure entertainment! (You have to either read the whole thing, or scroll down a little to see his top ten list) He actually did get 3 cornrows done before he realized they were 3 bucks a row. I am tired of seeing more hair hanging from Professional Football Players’ helmets. If I were a defender I would yank the hair of the guy I was guarding, penalty or not.

Number 3: I am so over Kurt Warner. I hated him when he played for the Rams and seemed to always rack up points against my fantasy teams, causing me to lose in the playoffs several years in a row. That makes me hate him more than if someone made me watch 24 hours of Teletubbies without a bathroom break. Fantasy sports is serious business. I also think Warner is hanging on to his career way too long. Time to hang it up, Mr Warner. So many bad decisions in so little a time. Go grab Brett Favre and spend time in the motivational speaker circuit before becoming an ESPN analyst!

On the same note, and in the same spirit. I have decided I am a New York Jets fan, and a Green Bay Packers fan, and let me tell you why.

New York Jets:

Number 1: For whatever reason, I started liking the Jets from a young age when my parents bought me a Green Jets Jersey for Christmas. It was number 99 Mark Gastineau. Gastineau was a solid member of the defensive line. I know I have mentioned this before.

Number 2: The Jets are off to a hot start this year, and the one game I did watch was very entertaining. It is easier to get behind a team that wins, at least to start.

Number 3: I have always liked Green as a color.

Number 4: I think the main draw is that I have always said I was a Jets fan, again, stemming from my gift when I was but a boy. My family knows me as a Jets fan, so if the shoe fits, wear it...perhaps?

Packers:

Number 1: For whatever reason, I drafted a couple of Packers players a few years ago for a fantasy league, and they were awesome. Greg Jennings was one of them. This led me to draft him again. He is a solid wide out with speed and can rack up the fantasy points. Same with Donald Driver. Solid. Great fantasy team additions.

Number 2: Since I drafted some fantasy players, I decided to watch the Packers games when they came on TV. They are a fun team to watch. Their running back, Ryan Grant reminds me of Barry Sanders, who is probably one of my favorite RB’s of all time. Favre was an amazing QB. The comeback king.

Number 3: This should probably be reason number 1 if we are going by level of importance, which I am not, so its number 3... The Strong Safety, Bybee, put such a hit on Randy “the Mouth” Moss a season or two ago that I bet still hurts. I can’t stand Moss, so that made my day. I am sort of partial to defensive plays too. I still recall vividly the hit Steve Atwater (a small free safety for the Broncos) delivered to Christian Okoya ( a large running back for the chiefs). You heard the crack through the TV screen. Such a small guy completely laying a big guy out. Awesome.

Number 4: Aaron Rodgers. I don’t want to like this guy. But, he keeps playing so solid that I am drawn to him. I can’t help but compare him to Steve Young. (Young sat behind Montana as back up for several years before having his breakout performance and subsequently earn the starting spot.) Young was an awesome QB. ( why do I keep mentioning the same guys?) Favre was (is?) an awesome QB. You can not deny that, even if he has trumped even Michael Jordan on the retirement/return fiasco. They have almost reached the level of bad 90210 reruns. How many times can (should) these shows be reran? Let it go. I still can’t get over seeing Favre in purple. If I were a betting man I would place 50/50 odds on a Green Bay fan putting a hit on him before the Vikings go into Lambeau for their game in November. Like a mafia hit. Does Green Bay have a mafia?

So, in summary, these are the teams I am going to cheer for. I am going to buy me a New York Jets pennant. Perhaps a Green Bay Jersey. Label me a fan all over again.

I had to do another sports post. It was requested. Stay tuned for many non sports posts coming down the pipe soon.

Photos of Strangers

We just got back from a week in Southern California. San Diego, Sea World, Beaches, Disneyland. The next update on the family blog will be all about that. For this blog, I was thinking about photos, as in photographs. As in the people inside those photographs.

As we walked around Sea World, and Disneyland, we took tons of pictures, just like everyone else,(except maybe the Asian visitors because lets face it, they take a lot of pictures.) So as we were doing so, I noticed that it was impossible to eliminate total strangers from some of the pictures. Well, that in turn got me thinking about how many photo's I am in and have no idea? I figure this trip alone at least 50 people took a picture of me, some of them had no choice, I was standing too close to whatever object they were photographing. Some, like most of the Disney Princesses, just wanted a photo of me.

I started looking through the photos of ours that have strangers in them. Poor folks have no idea they are being scrutinized right now. It is quite entertaining to look at the people that are in your photos.

What is the lady in the black shirt thinking? It appears she is not very happy at the happiest place on earth.

I hope that the afterlife includes a huge photo album of all the photos that were ever taken of me. I wonder how many of them caught me picking my nose? I wonder how many are just my butt. I remember once at an air show in Vegas I took a discreet picture of some guy's feet. He had napkins tapered and cut to guard his toes from the sun. I had the friends I was with pose just right so I could secretly get a photo of him. He had no idea. His next life photo album will include a picture of his feet and his home made sun shield. Maybe he will congratulate himself for protecting himself from sun cancer? Perhaps he forgot that moment of ingenuity and I am doing him a favor, capturing a memory.

I remember also in my younger years, aka college, trying to get into strangers photos. There are many photos of me out there ruining someone else's background. This was funny to me at the time. Maybe when I see that photo album in the next life I will have some regrets and think I was a jerk. JP Mataalii ruined our shot at getting in our High School Class photo twice. We were perfectly positioned to do the run to the other side thing, and he chickened out because Mr Marine (Vice Principal) was looking at us. Turns out Mr Marine wanted us to do it and was watching thinking we would.

Here's another one photo.

The kid in the back row has no idea I have a picture of him closing his eyes on Space Mountain. Was he scared? Was he sneezing? Poor guy will forever be in my mind as a sneezing rider of Space Mountain, or Ghost Galaxy, as it is called for Halloween Time. (Side note: Very awesome ride. Side note number 2: A lady that was near by when this picture came up on the screen felt bad for me because she thought I was about to cry. Side note 3: The kids loved this ride, despite what it looks like from the photo.)

So these are the thoughts that run through my mind while enjoying everything there is at Disneyland.

So basically I just want to see the photo album that has every picture of me ever taken. Or maybe I don't.

Its Underway

Well, the NFL season is officially underway, and I love it. I love football season. I love football starting for so many reasons. It means we are closer to winter, and hence the ski season. I love skiing.

I am still looking for an acceptable answer as to how someone picks a sports team. As I have given it more thought, I have come up with a few reasons of my own. I think if you are ok with how the uniform looks, like watching what a few of the players can do, and enjoy the time watching them, then its a good start. I think that a big help though, is repetition. What I mean is this: If you watch the same team again and again, they will obviously grow on you. I have two very strong examples in my own life of this. When I was little, I liked BYU. (Yes you read that right, I can admit it.) In my defense, my parents had season tickets and took me to all the home games. It was so fun to be at the games. I still remember many of the games. I saw BYU beat Miami in Provo in 1990. Huge game. Fun game. I remember making a paper airplane out of one of the pages of the program that made it all the way to the field. I was stoked. I was a BYU fan all the way through, and I even memorized the fight song and used to wait around on the field after the game to get player autographs. Freddie Whittingham signed my BYU shirt, I got a wristband from Sean Covey, and a chinstrap from Mark Bellini. I even had the Mormon rap and the Ty Detmer rap on cassette and played them both at high volumes on my radio. It was awesome. Sometime in those formative years, my Grandpa Simons started taking me to the Utah games. A game here and there became every home game. While it was fun to go to games with Grandpa, I knew nothing about the U. Grandpa would tell me things here and there, and a second or third cousin played for them here and there, so I soon became converted to the truth, and am now a Utah Fan. I am not a BYU hater, don't tell anyone but I actually like to see them do well. I just want Utah to win the rivalry game each year. My second example is my being an Angels fan. As mentioned in a previous post, I use to be a Mets fan. After going to so many Bees games though, I slowly converted to an Angels fan because it was names I knew from watching the games in Salt Lake. So exposure has a big deal to do with being a fan. I still am having a hard time choosing an NFL team to get behind, but I watched the New York Jets and the Green Bay Packers the first week of the season and had a great time watching both teams. I am starting to accept Aaron Rodgers as a QB for the Packers. Anyway, I am still looking for explanations from you guys about this topic.

Another thing I have realized is that it is so fun is going to the stadiums. My quest to see a baseball game in every stadium is underway. I have always hated the Yankees. HATED THEM. I am not sure why, but I honestly feel this extreme hatred for everything Yankees. Or at least used to. Last summer I went to Yankee Stadium. I have a hard time hating those Yankees now. I feel like I am peeking through the blinds at them, just to keep up secretly with what is going on with them. I am excited for this coming week, we have Angels-Yankees tickets in Anaheim!

So the first week of football, as mentioned is underway. I think football games is what makes fall speed by. Waiting each week for the games makes time cruise and before you know it its Thanksgiving. So with the first week of Football comes the first week of Fantasy Football as well. I went a little overboard and have a total of four teams. Its too many. My first week is looking bad, especially in the league I am matched up against Rebecca. Her team is crushing my team. Its bad. Real bad. I have not had my masculinity challenged to this extent since Laurie Anderson beat me and 4 other guys in a game of Risk in college.

Yeah, that was a bad day too. It almost makes me return to the fetal position sucking my thumb. All I can do is look forward to week 2 and make some early adjustments.

Tune in again soon, I have a few more posts coming soon... non sports posts I may add. One more thing about sports though, did anyone else see Shaquille O'Neals quote that he thinks that Ben Rothlesberger is the third best QB in the NFL? He went on to say that if that is true, then he (Shaq) should play football because he is better than Ben. I laughed hard for two reasons: 1- Rothlesburger is no where near the third best QB in the league, and 2- are you kidding me Shaq? Go back to the movies.

My Grandpa passed away last summer before the Utah Utes season began. I really miss him. He was my goto Sports Almanac. Anytime I had a question about a rule, a call, or when I wanted to just analyze a game, he was the guy I talked to. He had a anecdote to life that always related to sports. He took me to so many sporting events, and supported us faithfully in any sports we participated in. I remember him always being at the little league games. I have really thought a lot about Grandpa lately, I bet he would have an answer on how to pick a team.

My fantasy world

Last night Chad and I spent well over an hour participating in a live on-line draft for a fantasy football league we play in. Last week we drafted for another fantasy football league that Chad commissions. Today I've been trying to decide who I should start and who I should bench in both leagues (Rivers or Manning? ). In case you didn't know, I love fantasy football!

I've been playing since 1999, before I met Chad. I was a huge NBA fan at the time but wasn't too interested in football. A friend of mine convinced me to play so I thought I'd give it a shot. I've been playing every season since and I LOVE football. Over the years I have taken 1st place once and 2nd place 3 times. I've managed 11 teams and been commissioner twice. I also played fantasy basketball for a few years (I was commissioner twice and placed 1st and 3rd) but have since given it up. I even played fantasy hockey for a couple of years (I know nothing about hockey, but it was fun and I took 1st place!). If you didn't think I was a geek before, you do now!

So what makes Fantasy sports so fun and addicting? For me it is the competition. Sadly, I am very UN-athletic so growing up I never really participated in any sports. My competitive drive is resigned to manifest itself over board games (Scrabble anyone???). Over the years I've become a big fan of sports. Since I lack the ability to play, I have discovered the joy of being an observer. Fantasy sports gives me the chance to be more of a "participant" than I ever was before. It's the perfect medium for us athletically challenged sports-lovers.

I've got some great players on my teams this year. I managed to snag Peyton Manning last night. As Chad said, he is my favorite player. But Chad's wrong when he says I only like him because he's cute. I like him because he's got amazing accuracy, great leadership, a strong presence in the pocket and a very fine backside. AND he's cute! My Colts are the best, but I also like the Giants (I just love the Manning bros!) and the Packers. I want to like the Cowboys because I really like a lot of their players, but I'm just not sure I can bring myself to say I'm a Cowboys fan. I've always loved T.O. so I might have to cheer for the Bills this year. We'll see...

I'm excited to have another female playing in our friends and family league this year (yay McKayla!). So how many other Fantasy Football playing women are out there? I know I'm not the only one. How about football fans? Who's your favorite team and player(s)? And most importantly, are you ready for some football?!??!??

Fantasy Sports

You women readers may want to get the men involved in this one. The end of Summer always marks one huge landmark event for me: Drafting my Fantasy Football Team. I admit, I am addicted, hooked, lined and sinkered. I started playing fantasy football in 1997, out of curiosity to see what it was all about. I had no clue. All I knew is that when I was watching football games, they had a little ticker at half time about the fantasy impact. This was enough to get me to start to dabble. Sheer curiosity. So I did a team. Then I did it again, now I can not wait for it. It doesn't stop at football either. I do fantasy basketball. I have a fantasy baseball team. I even have a football survival team, football pick 'em bracket, and salary cap fantasy football. Shamefully, the same curiosity got me into a fantasy NASCAR bracket, fantasy Wimbledon Bracket (I have a crush on most of the female tennis players from Europe), and fantasy golf. Thankfully the last three didn't stick.

A quick synopsis of fantasy sports. You get into a league against friends (or strangers) who all draft a mock team. Any current active player is free game. You can draft the quarterback from the Dolphons to throw to the receiver from the 49ers. So you get your team together and place them in their spots and whatever stats they earn in the real game, gets transferred over to your team stats. So the trick is getting the lineup each week of the guys that are going to have the good stats. Then your fantasy stats are matched up against another's fantasy stats and the team with the best stats wins the game that week. This may be confusing to the non-fantasy player, but it doesn't matter.

My point in all of this is really not to give a sales pitch for fantasy sports. If you have not ventured into that world, and are a sports fan, you are definitely missing out. Think of it as Dungeons and Dragons for former athletes-or the "wish-they-were-athletes for that matter. The games come with all sorts of unspoken rituals and bragging rights. A "my dad can beat up your dad" sort of game.

In recent years I have realized something about playing fantasy sports though. It has ruined my fanmanship. (Did I just make up a word?) This has become more and more apparent due to the constant cajoling and mocking from my family. Yes, I will elaborate. ( Yes, I know I am pretending someone is asking me questions as I write.)

My family is a sports family. Sports fans all around. Football fanatics. (It was very important for me to use the entire root word for fan there when mentioning football. It really brings out the true definition.) My Grandpa played every sport and coached every sport. He was so actively involved in the sports program at East High, right up to his death last summer, that I am sure a field, arena, or weight room in the future will have his name on it. His sons, my uncles, all played every sport as well, some as far as college. My immediate family, IE- dad and brothers, all played. As far as football goes, they are all avid Chicago Bears fans. My sister-in-law, amazingly (or maybe not coincidentally), is a Bears fan as well. (That makes it easier on game days I would imagine.) I have 4 brothers. 2 of them, plus my dad, cheer the bears rain or shine, even the Kyle Orton years. They know exactly where they stand. The other likes the Giants, and one likes the 49ers. (Get to the point you say, and stop with the parenthesis?) Had you asked me years ago, I would have said I was a New York Jets fan-and I may still be. I am not sure what ever happened to make me a New York Jets fan, except I recall getting a replica Mark Gastineau jersey, number 99, for Christmas when I was not more than 8 years old. So I started watching the Jets. Thankfully I avoided watching the Broncos and the Chargers even though they were on TV the most.

Back to fantasy sports. Fantasy sports have destroyed my ability to choose and cheer for a favorite team. Living in Utah makes it hard to side with any football team. I know the Mormon world likes to side with the 49ers because Steve Young played there and that somehow makes them an honorary LDS team, but not me. So my brothers have given me a lot of lip the last few years and have tried to force my hand. I have been called a fair weather fan. A bandwagoner. Truth is, I am not sure what to do about it. I cheer for the players that end up on my fantasy team. To be honest, I do not like this situation. I need to pick a team. I thought for a while I would become a Packers fan, because I loved watching Favre, and I had a couple of the Green Bay receivers on my teams, but I just can't bring myself to get behind Rodgers. He looks too awkward. And I could never cheer for Minnesota. Favre should be ashamed of himself!

I want a team I can get behind. How does someone choose a favorite team anyway? Its almost obvious that if you live in Dallas, you like the Cowboys. Again, though, Utah does not have that hometown tie. With basketball we have it. With baseball we sort of have it (the Salt Lake Bees are the farm team for the Angels.) So I pose this question...what do you sports fans look for in choosing a favorite team? How do you readers choose your team? I know which teams I hate, but can't settle on one team to cheer on. I want one to hang pennants in my den and by replica jerseys again. Rebecca likes the Colts, but it started because she thinks Peyton Manning is cute. She use to like the Patriots for the same reason, as in Tom Brady. Obviously, I don't have that same draw. Over the last 10 years I have transitioned in baseball from a Mets fan to an Angels fan because of watching so many Salt Lake games and getting to know the players. (I was a Mets fan because that was my little league team mascot.) Not getting to know the players personally, but watching them in Salt Lake and then seeing them play in "the bigs." Baseball is easy. I am a huge baseball fan, almost to the point that I do not need a team because I just like watching the game. But...

I want to pick a side.

I want to be a fanatic.

Fantasy sports is making that difficult.